Shirdi Sai Prayers From Anonymous Sai Devotee from USA:
I am here to overcome my grief for a baby I lost recently, my third miscarriage.
I have been a devotee of Baba for close to 10 years now. All major decisions in my life like marriage and first kid(son 5years) all happened due to Baba’s divine blessings and He has always been by my side when I needed help. But from last 2 years I am having miscarriages continuously when trying for second kid. First time I lost my kid in 2019 March at 8 weeks since baby did not have heart beat. Then again in Jan 2020 I lost one more time due to ectopic pregnancy and most recent is last week September when I went for early ultrasound at 6 weeks and there was heartbeat. I was ecstatic since I had sincerely been praying to Baba that He blesses me with baby only when everyone is fine even if it’s late.
One week later I went for second ultrasound since I started bleeding and there was no growth and heartbeat and the doctors said that I was miscarrying again. I have been shattered and my belief on Baba is kind of shattered. I did Sai Satcharitra parayana just before trying for this baby but one chapter a day not like in a week. I feel helpless since I feel Baba is not with me anymore. I had a weird dream before I got pregnant this third time that Baba in my dream is saying kick her out she is stealing the rags like in Satcharitra. It’s been 4 days since I am losing my baby and in pain but not sure why this is happening. I am failing to understand and accept why Baba left me. Please pray for me for next pregnancy and please tell me what should I do to get Baba’s blessings again please! I have many things to do before I try again like blood work and specialist visits but not sure even all those will help me without Baba’s blessings? Om Sai Ram please guide me what to do. Please tell me how to get Baba back into my life more than anything since I am broken and I feel Baba cheated and left me.